When life throws a LEMON...

My heart is broken.

Tears seem to have carved a permanent path down my cheeks and I have hyperventilated at least seven times since Saturday. It all happened so fast.

My favorite camera is gone.

I was doing a little impromptu session for a dear friend, with my girls in tow (something I never do), but Nate was out of town. As we finished up and went to get packed up, I set my camera on the trunk of my car. I got the girls buckled and situated, said goodbye to my friends, and drove off … with my camera still on the back of my car.

Who does that?!!!!!! I feel so stupid.

I noticed very quickly (we're talking less than a couple of minutes after leaving) that my camera was not snuggled in its designated and protected spot in my bag and I had a heart attack. Overwhelmed with dread and fear and despair I whirled the car around and drove as fast as I could to the only place it could have fallen off.

But it was gone. If it had been run over there would have been pieces. Someone picked it up.

Surely the person who found it would turn it in. Surely.

In between gasps for air I called a friend to come help me. We scoured the roads, sides of the roads, and called the police. I must have looked pretty awful and pathetic because a nice gentleman pulled over and thought I was in some kind of trouble and offered me some help. I wish he had found my camera. Bless his heart.

To make matters worse – all the images from my session Saturday morning and my friend’s session were on the disc – in the camera. It’s just so awful….awful.

The police came out and I filed a report with them. The officer was very nice but I could tell he was trying hard not to laugh at me. I’m sure I was quite the sight. Tear streaked cheeks telling him about how I left an insanely expensive piece of equipment on the back of my car… and drove off. Funny?! Probably. I hope I make it there and can laugh about it. Maybe in hindsight.

My girls were so very sweet. Each offering me plenty of hugs and kisses and prayers. It made me grateful for their safety. Even though right now it’s hard for me to see past the gravity of the situation I know it could be worse. Much worse. And that’s what I am holding onto right now. I cry often…and am definitely one tear away from another break down but prioritizing helps. My camera was my most prized possession. And frankly, the most expensive thing I own, but that’s all it was – a possession.

{Friends, please remind me of this when I am crying on your shoulder.}

I still have my family. And friends. And health. A girl couldn’t ask for anything more. I certainly can’t wait for my husband to return home so I can bury my head in his chest and know that everything will be ok.

I pray that whoever took my camera finds it in their hearts to turn it in. And if not, I hope that they really need it for the money. So far nothing has come up.

Anyways - thanks for letting me rant. It’s been very therapeutic and I do think I will mend. I am already working on getting my camera replaced, hopefully by the end of the week!! I’m down, but I’m not out! =)

Lemonade anyone? {sigh}